3 Types of Human Communication

Are we truly communicating? Are you engaging people?

Humans are not at their best when sending and receiving messages that are either delayed or blindly broadcast into “the stream”, desperately hoping someone will see it.

It is inefficient, impersonal, and too easy to lose, ignore, or forget in an Attention Era where each day means more new signals.

It will kill our society.

How are you doing business?  How are you leading people?

Here are three ways we can choose to communicate.  As the list progresses, communication degrades and becomes less effective.

 

Concurrent Communication

  • Personal Meeting
  • Skype / FaceTime / Google Hangout
  • Phone
  • Instant Message Conversation

 

Deferred Communication

  • Personal YouTube message
  • Voicemail
  • Text Message
  • Email
  • Facebook Message
  • Social Mentions (Twitter, Facebook, Google+, etc.)
  • Comment
  • Twitter DM
  • Mail
  • Telegraph

 

Broadcast Communication

  • Bullhorn yelling on corner
  • Sandwich boards
  • TV Commercial / Online Video Ad
  • YouTube Video
  • Radio
  • Pins on Pinterest
  • Billboards
  • Twitter Update
  • Facebook Update
  • Social Check-ins
  • Smoke Signals

 

If people are really your people, you need to talk.  Real friends don’t spend years trading delayed snippets of communication with each other.

Communication is more than words. True engagement is harder than you think.

Engage in real communication tonight,

Aaron@Biebert

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Give Nearly the Ultimate Gift

Giving one’s life for another is the ultimate gift.  Right?

However, that sort of sacrifice isn’t a gift often requested or needed in a modern society.  So what’s the next best alternative?

Giving someone a piece of your life.

Ask the adult children of many ultra-successful 8pm Warriors what they really wanted for Christmas while growing up.  It won’t be another pony or sports car.

Does your kid really need 15 more toys?  Does your spouse need another shirt?  Do your team members really need golf balls or trinkets with your company logo?

Are they even gifts if they’re not wanted or needed?

What do most people truly want from their parents, spouses, children, leaders, or mentors?

Time.

Attention.

Some of your Life.

 

Basically, they want the stuff you can’t buy, fake, or transfer.

Next time you’re wondering what to get the “person who has everything”, try giving them a piece of your life.  Give them an extra amount of your precious time.  Even a smallest amount is appreciated.

To all of you who have taken a piece of your life this past year and given it to me in the form of feedback, ideas, or sharing my posts:

Thank you for nearly the ultimate gift!

 

I am thankful for your time.

Have a Merry Christmas!

Aaron@Biebert

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Don’t Be the Lonely Veterans of a One Soldier War

Picture yourself sitting on your porch when you’re 70.

Are you sitting alone?

Will anyone care what you did tonight?  Last night?  Last year?

Will you?

One of my biggest fears is that as enter the twilight of my life, I will feel overwhelming sorrow that no one around me cares about my war stories from these “8pm Warrior missions” I fight every night.

I doubt I’m the only one.

You and I put our heart and soul into what we do.  I see it every day.

However, if we don’t include enough other people in our adventures, we risk being that old guy or gal sitting on the porch telling stories to people who don’t remember, don’t know, or don’t care.

We risk loneliness when we become so lost in a personal war with it’s private battles, that we let everything and everyone slip away.

It’s Christmas Eve.

 

Go spend time with family.  It’s nights like these when you fill up your future porch with more than your colleagues, partners, and clients.  Let others see your battles. Share your world with the people you want on your porch when you’re older.

We sit up every night working, reading, writing, thinking, and dreaming.  However, if we don’t share our life and involve others, we’re destined to be the lonely veterans of a one soldier war.

Picture your porch.  Then fill it up.

8pm Warriors don’t have to do it alone.

Have a Merry Christmas,

Aaron@Biebert

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5 Lessons Learned from Tweeting & Blogging in Pain

Disclosure:  I had surgery recently and am back on prescription Vicodin after trying to get off the pain meds too quickly.  I’m learning some new lessons and think they might be applicable to everyday life.  Hear me out.

We can learn something from my pain.



Here is what I notice as I try to work through the pain and medication:

  • I forget things and I repeat myself.
  • I won’t say things as well as I could if I wasn’t in pain or medicated.
  • I use bad grammer.
  • I get distracted from what I’m working on.
  • I repeat myself after I forget I already said something.

I ramble on.

I wonder if we all make similar mistakes when coping with the pain of going through a breakup, dealing with death, losing business (or a job), or facing other severe challenges in life.

Many try medicating the pain away so they don’t feel it.

Others try ignoring it until they break.

Some try both.

Of course surgery is one thing and life is another.  However, when we see a fellow warrior struggling to get back up after a painful incident, we should help.  For those of us in pain, we should accept help.

We can’t afford to ignore it. We don’t have time to waste.

All of us are guaranteed pain in life.


It’s how we deal with it that determines our future.  We can’t do it alone.

Have a pain-free night,

Aaron@Biebert

PS. If you’re curious how I’ve been tweeting, feel free to follow me at my @Biebert account. Unfortunately, the new new twitter won’t let me reply twice, so I’ve left some of the bad tweets. I probably should take the advice of my doctor and sleep more, tweet less. Let me know what you think.

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If Winning Means Losing, How Do We Win?

What is the cost of winning?

 

I tried something new today in the car.  Instead of tweeting/texting/emailing, I thought about the things I’ve lost in pursuit of my life goal.   Maybe you can relate?

It’s actually quite startling:

  • I was once the ultimate romantic, using my creativity to surprise my wife with special tokens of my love.  Now I’m an average husband and I sell my creativity to others.
  • When I was a kid, I rode my bike for miles to buy my mom a birthday present. In September, I forgot her birthday.
  • I have seven younger siblings.   I hardly know them anymore.
  • Old friends hear from me once a year, when Facebook tells me it’s their birthday.
  • Years ago I was in peak physical shape. Now I’m overweight and out of breath after playing with my kids.

Even though I have experienced the joy of victory, I lost much to get there.

What have you lost?

 

Why?

Despite all the talk about pushing ourselves, delegating, working harder, smarter, or longer, there remains a limit to what one can do each day.

Successful leaders must make choices. Real choices will always lead to loss. Such is the nature of scarcity.

Focus on business? Lose relationships.
Win a war? Lose lives.
Get fame? Lose privacy.

Sometimes you must lose to win.  It’s your choice.

Losers won’t choose. Winners are losers. Choosing means losing. Isn’t life complicated?

How do we win?

 

We win when we’re aware of what we’re losing, but our goals still matter more.  We win when we sleep soundly at night.

Chase worthy goals tonight,

Aaron@Biebert

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Attribution Error and Why We Need Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving needs it’s own day because it’s a good thing that doesn’t come naturally.

It’s counter-intuitive, but the richer a country or person becomes, the less thankful they become as well.  Modern psychology backs me up on this.  A successful person often attributes their success to what they’ve done.

Human beings tend to take credit for good things and blame external factors for bad things.  That is part of the fundamental attribution error concept.

Even Abraham Lincoln recognized this in the beginning of his original Thanksgiving Proclamation:

The year that is drawing towards its close, has been filled with the blessings of fruitful fields and healthful skies. To these bounties, which are so constantly enjoyed that we are prone to forget the source from which they come…

– Thanksgiving Proclamation by Abraham Lincoln

We are forgetful.

Great leaders establish rituals that help remind people of what they ought to do and ingrain it into our culture.  The Thanksgiving holiday is no exception.

Take the reminder.  Shake off the cobwebs.  Remember where the good things in your life came from.

Then, say “Thank You“.

Have a meaningful Thanksgiving,

Aaron@Biebert

PS.  I am thankful for the 8pm Warrior community.  I have learned so much from you, your comments, and your friendship. Thank you!

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Bred in Captivity, Can Generation Y Survive in the Wild?

Zookeepers breed endangered species in captivity to save them from extinction.  However, something bad usually happens.

When they release them into the wild, the animals that were bred in captivity often do not avoid predators and are not able to find ample food or shelter for themselves. They die as a result.

We are breeding humans in captivity.

 

In an effort to protect children from the dangers of failure or setback, some have made them unfit for the wild world they’ll be living in. For years, I’ve watched parents and teachers lie to their children.

In the name of self esteem, they comfortably praise children for everything they do, even when they fail to do anything special, smart, or strong.

You tried?  Here’s a trophy or ribbon!

Unfortunately, this isn’t real life. Now that Generation Y is out in “The Wild”, they are surprised when the company they applied to doesn’t think they’re special, the words they write aren’t smart, or their strongest performance isn’t enough.  They learn that anything but first place may not be good enough.

Confused, these young people move in with their parents, go back for more school, or join the Occupy Wall Street protests.

They were bred in captivity.

 

If we want our children or team members to know how to hunt or protect themselves, then we must teach them how at an early age.  No longer should people be praised because they participated.  It is lazy and easy to praise everyone for everything.  Far more difficult and important, is to find the specific gifts that each person has, encourage them to use the gifts, and then support them as they fail, learn, and grow.

We must teach them to fish, not give them fish.  We must show them the real world, not hide them from it.

We must let them fail.

The school of hard knocks teaches real life lessons.  Losers will become learners. Failing may be the best thing that can happen to a young person.

Let them grow up in the wild.

Have a wild night,

Aaron@Biebert

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Your Team is Looking for a Good Fight

Organizations will either come together in a fight for a common goal, or turn inward and fight each other.

Look at any club, family, church, department, nation, or business you are a part of. When does the most infighting take place? Is it during a fight for its life? When pushing towards a common mission?

Nope.

Big, slow moving companies like Microsoft know what I’m talking about. So does the PTA at an already successful school. They’ve lost purpose. They lose focus.

When there is nothing big to fight, they find stupid little things to focus on and whine about. In the end up, they fight each other.

Whether they admit it or not, most people are warriors.

They’re looking for a good fight. They need a mission.

Leaders with a vision can keep people focused on a common goal. They rally their troops and get them fighting together, not against each other.

We need to embrace our team of warriors and give them something to fight for.

All warriors need a mission.



Lead a mission tonight,

Aaron@Biebert

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